Saturday, July 24, 2010

Get over it

Sometimes I have a hard time getting over things. I try prayer, mind control, journaling. I'll think I've worked it out and gotten over it but then it'll hit me again.

There's one issue at work that I can't seem to get over, and I've tried all the usual stuff. The other day I was talking to my daughter on the phone and remembered an article I'd read in the "O" magazine. (I like that magazine.) In the article a woman wrote about her experience having a stillborn child. It was such a sad experience, as you might expect. One thing she said stuck with me. She wrote about how people would talk to her about closure and said, "Here's what I think about closure. Closure is shit." She went on to say that the baby is gone forever, she'll be sad about it forever.

My issue at work is tiny, really nothing, compared to losing a child. But it occurred to me that I might be expecting something that wouldn't happen. This thing is going to continue to hurt me. I'm most likely not somehow going to be able to get over it and not feel hurt any more. So, now I'm trying to figure out a way to use that realization. Maybe when I feel the hurt I can feel it, accept that it does hurt, then do the mind control thing of trying to think of other things and the other usual methods. Could help.